I had a visit with my endocrinologist today and, as usual, she made me feel like I'm moving forward on the right path. We made a slight adjustment to my early morning basal insulin to get my fasting BG down a tad, but she didn't feel any other changes were warranted yet. I had some "highs here and there," yes, but they didn't follow a pattern and I never let them last long.
But the best part is that she made me feel about a million times better about not gaining weight. I think I managed to gain a couple pounds if her scale is the same as my OB's, but she (and her nurse) seemed slightly confused about there being any concern. Aside from only being 14 weeks (tomorrow) into my pregnancy, she commented that much weight gain isn't really necessary as long as you're eating enough and eating well (and taking prenatals). She also agreed that it's not relevant to my diabetes management since we know what my blood sugar is (and it's nowhere near high enough to prevent me from gaining). Maybe that was just an off-handed comment on my OB's part, but if she expresses that concern again I'll ask her to please confer with my endo.
I also went ahead and mentioned that the hormones have been a nightmare for me emotionally, because my counselor felt that both of my doctors should know that that's going on. She wasn't at all surprised considering my history of depression and commented that some women feel the best of their entire life, and others just ride an emotional roller coaster. She confirmed that I'm doing everything to take care of myself (including staying on my Wellbutrin), but it honestly just makes me feel better when someone acknowledges my depression with understanding and acceptance. I definitely feel pressure to be happy for everyone, because that's what people expect from a pregnant woman, and I've already had one person I'm close to insist that this "isn't normal," that this is a "wonderful time" and I should be happy. I'm certain she said this in an attempt to get me to step up my attempts at treating depression, but the last thing I want is to feel abnormal (and guilty) for not being deliriously happy. Happy about having a baby? Yes, I am. But happy, as in mood and attitude? No, I am not. And I feel like I have to apologize for it at every turn.
That said, at least my anxiety over my weight has been alleviated. Really, I'm just not going to stress about it unless it actually looks like it's becoming problematic.